Skip to main content

Facing the Demons- Resolution to the Problems of Life

Life is cruel, conniving and heartless companion at times. It at times holds our vision with such cold hands that a shiver runs down the spine, and while try to turn our eyes away from it, it refuses to let go of the strangle it holds us in. In moment as those, we close our eyes and want to believe that every thing is well.

There could be some merit in that when one looks are some momentary misfortune has befallen on to our being, as would be advocated by the proponents of positive thinking. The gang of glass-half full, but then it does not work and at its worse, works at its negative, when the problem at hand stems from a rot which is deep within. Symptoms which pokes and hits you with brutality is just the pointer which attempts to point to something which has derailed much deeper. In situation as that, escapism is of no use, although to evaluate it with some more seriousness, it is in sheer stupidity of ours that we presume our escapist attitude, our cowardly attempt to flee into a fantasy world where we are surrounded by all benevolence around us and where we exist as an omniscient and all-powerful soul, to mean the same as "Positive Psychology" or positive re-enforcement.
This is an absolute fallacy. To make a mistake or to err is human, but to continue to err and imagine that ills in life which gather around you on account of the error, will fade away out of sheer boredom on their own, or that you can wish it away with a strong will power, is stupidity of the highest order. Positive psychology does not meet that when you make a mistake, or when you are in a mess, sometime not on account of your own doing, like loss of health, job, love etc., you ought to believe that every thing is fine. Sometime you might want to believe that, to support a fragile mind which is unable to cope up with the overall failure that your state is into, but it will offer no resolution and eventually when you get tired of fantasizing, against everyday dose of reality, you will fall with an even harder thud, as floating in a your imaginary world of playing either a victim of fate or imaginary success, you would have made no real attempt to improve on the state that you are in.
I have had my own share of pitfalls, which left such scars on my thoughts that I do tend to at times float in an imaginary world, where I no longer need to prove my love-worthiness to my parents and I am loved anyways, where I am rich enough to go out tomorrow to buy a house of my own to live tomorrow, where I am at the very least, sagacious enough to know that how I can get my finances or health in order and act on that knowledge. Imagining has not helped me this far, I lull myself into believing what I imagine would be a nicer world to live into, and I wake up with dreaded nightmares only to realize that I am every time waking up to a harsher truth, every time my cocoon of fantasy is hit by a small brush of reality. If my health is not good, by imagining otherwise whether or not it was an well-deserved or undeserved calamity, my sugar level will not come down, my LDL will not go up;  though it will maybe, help me survive little longer than immediately drowning into despair:  the real resolution can only happen by accepting the state with absolute objectivity, unmindful of the pain that it brings and acting on it. All problems in life are handled by most in three different ways:
First will be :
- I have a problem
- This is bullshit, there is no problem, it is imaginary problem
- I want to do nothing about it.
Result: Problem aggravates, builds on itself till it kills you.
Second is:
-I have a problem
-I believe there is a problem.
- I am doomed because there is a problem which is beyond me, I can do nothing about it.
Result: My depression kills me before the problem does.
Third is:
-I have a problem
- I take the problem as a reality, am crushed by the weight of truth, but I have no excuse. It happened because of me or sheer spontaneity of the circumstances. I decide to find, under the circumstances what best can be done about it.
- I act on it and Start to do something about it, from this moment.
Result: I either resolve the problem, or die busy trying to resolve it, either way the pain in the process is resolved.

I do not believe there is any other way, and I do believe, that the last one, which I would call facing the demons is the only way to resolution of the question which Life puts in front of each one of us.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

दो जोड़ी नन्ही आँखें

अनदेखे ख़्वाबों की दो जोड़ी नन्हीआँखें, जिन्होंने स्वप्न देखने की आयु से पूर्व दु:स्वप्न देख आँखें मूँद लीं। जो क़दम अभी चलना ही सीखे थे, लड़खड़ा कर थम गए। बचपन के घुटने पर लगी हर खरोंच, व्यस्कों के गाल पर एक तमाचा है। धर्म के आडंबरों से अछूता बाल मन जो मंदिरों और मस्जिदों को अपनी आत्मा में रखता था, धर्म की दरारों पर अपना नन्हा शव छोड़ निकल पड़ा। कहीं दूर,दग्ध शरीर के ताप से दूर, जब यह अकलुषित हृदय पहुँचा तो एक और निष्पाप दूधिया आत्मा दिखी, जिसकी पलकों के कोरों में उसकी आँखों के जैसे ही अविश्वास से सहमा हुआ अश्रु रूका था। एक दूसरे के गले लग कर दोनों बाल मन दरिया के टूटे बाँध की तरह बह निकले। घाव बाँटे, एक दूसरे के हृदय में चुभी धरती की किरचें निकाली और न देखे हुए स्वप्नों का श्राद्ध रचा। उसने थमती हिचकियों में अपना नाम बताया - ‘आसिफा’। और दुख के साथी की ठोड़ी थाम कर कहा - ‘मत रो, न्याय होगा।’ धरती की तरफ़ नन्ही गुलाबी उँगली दिखा कर कहा- “देख, भले लोग लड़ रहे है मेरे लिए, न्याय होगा। तेरे लिये भी लड़ रहे होंगे। तू मत रो” फिर बोली, “मैं पश्चिम से हूँ, तू पूरब से, पर हैं

बुद्धिजीवियों की बारात

बुद्धिजीवियों की बारात शरद जी रिटायर हो चुके थे। आधार का भय आधारहीन मान कर आधार बनवा चुके थे, और पेंशन प्राप्त कर के भोपाल मे जीवनयापन कर रहे थे। एक बार बिहार जा कर शरद जी नरभसा चुके थे, पुन: नरभसाने का कोई इरादा था नहीं, सो मामाजी के राज में स्वयं को सीमित कर के रखे हुए थे। इस्लाम आज कल ख़तरे मे नही आता था, संभवत: इमर्जेंसी के बाद से, इस्लाम सबल हो चुका था, और कल निपचती जींस और लोकतंत्र के ख़तरे मे रहने का दौर चल रहा था। न्यू मार्केट के कॉफ़ी हाऊस मे चंद बुद्धिजीवी लोकतंत्र पर आए संकट पर चर्चा कर लेते थे, जोशी जी वहाँ भी नहीं जाते थे। एक दफे वहाँ के मलियाली वेटर्स को जोशी जी के हिंदी लेखक होने का पता चल गया और उन्होंने जोशीजी को यिंदी यिम्पोजीशन के विरोध मे कॉफ़ी देने से मना कर दिया था। कहाँ शरदजी सरस्वती से ब्रह्मप्रदेश तक लिखना चाहते थे और कहाँ उन्हे बड़े तालाब के उत्तर भाग का लेखक घोषित कर दिया गया था। इस से क्षुब्ध जोशी जी अपने बग़ीचे मे टमाटर उगा रहे थे। जानने वाले कहते हैं कि इसके पीछे उनकी मँशा महान किसान नेता बन कर उभरने की थी, किंतु उन्हे पता चला कि आधुनिक किसान न

That Evil Ignorance- Rahul Gandhi and his Everyday Questions

“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.” - Theodore Roosevelt, American President 1901-1909 Rahul Gandhi  has again asked as question as to why the Soldiers martyred in the cowardly attack of the Chinese in the Galwan Valley did not carry weapons (ignoring that the treaty si